Hurt...continued prayers and encouragement to you in your sitch! Finally seems like you have started turning the corner towards saving yourself and it's a great thing to hear your words that reflect it.
Originally Posted by AS
That really sums it up right there. The person that we fell in love with and married is gone. I think we have so much trouble accepting that because they still look like the same person. But for whatever reason, the old person is gone and some new person is inhabiting the old body. When I read some of the piecing threads like Steve's or Joe2017's or Blu's it's pretty clear that even if one gets to the piecing phase the challenges are just as great if not even greater. There's no going back to what we had, it's gone. Even if we start down a new path with the WAS it's not going to be the nirvana we imagine it to be. Not sure if you saw JoeJoe1's post in Joe2017's thread, but he said his combat experience in Iraq and horrible loss of his grandmother in Katrina pale in comparison to piecing with his formerly adulterous wife, WOW is that ever a testament to just how difficult piecing is. So yes, we're all going through (or went through) a life change and letting go of the old life is the most difficult part of it. But once we do, there's a great sense of freedom that comes with it.
THIS ^^^^ Since in the almost a year that I've heard zippo from my WW in my sitch, for whatever reason (I guess for my own healing) I went past the whole current status of my sitch and focused on could/would I ever want her back AND what Stander says and what some folks are dealing with now on here is exactly the conclusion I came to. Accepting the reality of what I would confront IF she ever came back, actually made it WAY easier for me to accept the current status of my sitch. Perhaps a weird way to heal, but it's helped me immensely. Bottom line I would see my WW as tainted and so could never get back.
