Dear Gordie,
Andrew has hit it squarely - bottom line is that you've come so far and now your own feelings are coming more to the fore, because it might seem a bit safer.

Stay the course. Sending love, patience and the knowledge that you are not alone #TeamGordie xoxoxo

M 20+ T25+
S ~15.5 (BD)
BD 4/6/15
D 12/23/16

"Someone I loved once gave me
A box full of darkness.
It took me years to understand,
That this too, was a gift."
~ Mary Oliver