Been a while since I have posted. I hope everyone had an amazing holiday season and I wish everyone all the best in 2019. I have really turned a corner in the last couple of weeks and I am feeling amazing. I hosted and attended several dinners with family, friends and neighbors over Christmas, shared a lot of laughs and really enjoyed every minute. Me and the kids had a blast and enjoyed a lot of great quality time together. All the little moments in life really seem to have extra meaning these days and I feel a real sense of calm and inner peace.
Not much to report on as far as W goes and I am at the point now where I don't even feel the need to elaborate much. I will say that I view her actions from a very clear perspective now and some of her behavior over the last couple of weeks has really driven home detachment for me. I settled in nicely to life alone when she was living at the in laws for a month and I had a lot of time to analyze the situation internally. I began to see things for what they were over the last year and realized that I was hanging onto a very unhealthy relationship. When W returned to the house after the in laws vacation was over several of the realizations I had come to were quickly confirmed. One example I will provide, I hosted my parents for dinner between Christmas and New Years so they could spend some more time with the kids before they returned home. W was at work for the day but as a friendly gesture I invited her to join us. I spent all day busting my rear end cooking an amazing meal and making sure the house was clean. W walked in late from work just as dinner was about ready, we sat down to eat and all I heard about was how the mashed potatoes had too much milk in them, brown gravy does not go with prime rib and she won't eat it with out au jus and I was out of HP sauce so she really couldn't eat it. It was one complaint after another and she dumped most of her meal in the garbage. Me, the kids and my parents enjoyed our time together but I was left embarrassed and my parents disgusted. That really was the nail in the coffin for me.
I still hold some hope that one day M 2.0 could happen but as each day passes the list of things that would have to be acknowledged and worked on only grows.
