It all just hurts. She really just doesn’t care, apparently. She just wants out.
Has she said or done anything since BD to make you think otherwise? Honestly Burned, I agree with Vapo and Ginger that this whole D thing is nothing more than one whopper of a temp check on your part to try and "wake her up". That is NOT a reason to push D through. If you can rationally and calmly tell yourself that you want a D and are willing to pursue it if she doesn't then that's one thing, but if you're doing it just to get a reaction then you are setting yourself up for disappointment because all you are doing is giving her exactly what she wants.
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I haven’t clicked “send” yet but my next email to her is, “Sounds good, do you have time this week to meet me at the courthouse?” If it’s gonna happen anyway and she clearly wants it, it’ll be over and done before the weekend.
Sure it's what she wants RIGHT NOW. A week from now? A month from now? A year? Who knows. She doesn't even know.
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Sort of feels like a Mexican standoff or some perverted game of chicken. Well, she didn’t flinch.
They never do. When you temp check a WAS it NEVER goes your way.
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I guess I decided that this was a necessary step in the process. Things were stagnant. NC made no diffference. S made no difference. GAL made no difference. 180s were irrelevant because of NC. I stopped trying to control her, which apparently came across as me not caring about her and not having a backbone. To be clear, I’m NOT criticizing DB. I just think in my case it wasn’t effective in saving this M.
Your BD was 9 months ago, I know that seems like forever to you but it's highly unusual for an M to be saved in that short of a time after a BD. A lot of marriages out there are "saved" in less time, but only because they were just having some struggles, it wasn't a WAS situation. Once a spouse goes full WAS then it's a completely different ballgame with a much longer timeframe.
