Emerging from my fog? (pain18 DB X)

[SoTorn]

Yes you are dwelling on the past. I understand. I wish I could time warp to five years ago, beat the crap out of my old self and make sure that we went to MC before all of this even took hold. Coulda woulda shoulda. Past is the past! Stop dwelling on it.

It takes two to tango. Yes I read that same thread where your WW got the courage to ask you to go to MC and you shut her down. No matter whether that's true or not, her finding a lover while she is still married instead of again asking you for help fixing the M or putting her big girl past ties on and actually leaving you before she found a lover, would have been the mature choices that she could have made.

She decided to say "f**k everyone else's feelings, only I matter"

What I'm getting at is that your WW, just like mine, made the hateful and disgusting decision to start another relationship before ending the current one. That's 100% on them and not on us. You have no idea if anything you did differently would have avoided that. Stop dwelling on it and just be the man that you want to be now.

You are just bringing yourself down. There is a reason the windshield in a car is much larger than the rear view mirror. Because what's in front of us is more important than what's behind us