When people ask here about 'successful' reconciliations (where the relationship was restored and in piecing), the most common and obvious pattern is that the LBS did the following things - took accountability for their shortcomings, engaged in personal growth in professional and personal lives, walked the path of detachment and letting go, reduced contact and demolished any expectations, improved their emotional fitness, and got a life. It is about a complete mindset transformation and then following through with action.
So, that's what needs to happen. Because the outcome will always be you becoming a full human being and reclaiming your life - it's story and future trajectory. It creates empowerment and peace. I have never been at more peace in my life than I am now, and that is no small feat. For the first time in my adult life, I am excited about what my life is going to bring me. I don't recall being like this since I was a kid - full of hope.
This is completely achievable and not only that, it is a way better place to be.
I will add that your DBing should not be focused on your spouse. If you DB while having the goal of impressing your ex with your newfound badassery, you will fail. They can detect pursuit from a mile away.
Last edited by Joe2017; 01/07/1904:06 AM.
Save yourself. Nobody is coming! BD:11/2017 Filed:12/2017 Final: 2/2018
