I agree with Joe and Yail—not gonna play the time game, and time is not exactly my friend in this scenario.
Dress nice, separate cars, and keep it as brief as possible. Let her talk, but keep in control of meeting and duration, as well as validate.
I’ll keep in mind vocal tonality, as well as body language, and I’ll read those two posts—I’ve glanced at them before. I’m working on confidence (but I know my approach could be amateurish), and it’s part of my 180s. I’ve also been working on healthy lifestyle / grooming / dress for a while, so I feel like there has been some improvement, but I also know that there are others are in which I can improve. I can’t beat myself up too much—we are all works in progress.
I just feel like there is a whole range of outcomes for this—some better than others. What she told me back in the fall about a break or an S haunts me, but it also seems to me like her recent words / actions don’t totally support that. I know, I know—BELIEVE NOTHING THEY SAY, and ONLY HALF OF WHAT THEY DO.
I know that I’m mind-reading and engaging in expectations, but I feel like I need to be prepared for a number of things to happen (and some of these could combine):
*She wants to call off the cold-war between us, and start the new year right, especially with her being gone for 3 months starting this fall.
*“Something’s wrong with you / gotten into you recently. What’s wrong?”
*“Something’s wrong with us” (and she either wants to fix it, or S / D).
*“Why have you not been touching me / asking for sex / saying ILY, etc. recently?”
*“I’m not happy, and here’s why blah blah blah blah” (and then launches into a whole bunch of ‘reasons’)
*”You know what—I’m sorry. I’m sorry for being so angry with you, blaming you for this pregnancy and so withdrawn and not showing you love / sex / affection / whatever, and I’ve been really unfair towards you” (UNLIKELY AS H***, but it’s certainly possible). [For me, this is the best possible outcome, along with calling off the cold war between us.]
*“I want a S—after I come back from training in December / January.” Me: “I understand. But I also want to be with someone who wants to be with me. Let’s just get this started now.”
*“I want a S / D.”
*And, of course, my worst-case outcome as mentioned earlier, as unlikely as it is.
