1.) There is OM, YS is not mine, AND she wants S / D (so, all of the above—affair, love child, she wants out) No considered response yet. This is for me the absolute worst-case scenario, and I talked about this one in an earlier post.
2.) She wants a ‘break’ or a S.
3.) She wants a D.
I’ve mentioned this elsewhere but can’t find it, and the original was from Steve—I’d say something like this in response to 2 and 3:
“It takes 2 to get married, but only one to leave or get divorced. I love you and I believe that what we have can be saved and fixed if we put the work in. That said, I’m not going to force you to stay. However, I’m not going to help you pursue this because I am morally opposed to S / D.”
I would also add, and I’ve seen these elsewhere (so not totally sure who to give credit to without doing some research):
“If a S / D would be the only thing that would make you truly happy, then I will not stand in your way. I’ll wait for the paperwork.” And “I’ll still sleep in the MBR, but you can sleep wherever you like.”
