I think the woman is desperate and wants your attention. Sounds like she may have been drinking from what you posted. Generally, as you know, when someone is under the influence, they tend to blurt out exactly what is on their mind and it sounds like that is what she's been doing by sending you messages. If that is the case, it's taken a long time for those rose colored glasses to come off and realize that life w/your xh isn't a bed of roses....but that is not your problem.
Well, you can't solve her problem. She already knows how to prepare for a divorce, so she can figure it out all on her own. They made their bed, so they need to lay in it forever and a day. They are two adults and can figure out how to either make it work or go their separate ways.
I did have another thought...maybe she was testing the waters to see if you would respond and to see if you were still waiting for him and would be willing to welcome him back with open arms.
You did the right thing in deleting the messages and not responding. You may not hear from her again for a while...but do not be tempted to respond.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
