LBS dealing with WW (part 6)

[burned]

Joe, you are a DB god to me. I don’t know if there’s anything I can say that you haven’t already heard.

You’ve acknowledged it, and I agree, that the anger and resentment is strong. It also seems like you’re dishing it out fairly heavy-handedly. Maybe think back to the beginning of your DB days and think about whether your actions reflect needs or real love. Do your actions move her closer to you or push her further away? Does her feeling guilty and crying do anything at all to make YOU feel better? Or is it really just the actual “saying it” part that helps?

If it’s the latter, then why not write it down and save it for later? There will be a time when you can tell her how you feel with the help of a professional to moderate the discussion. In the meantime it seems to me like the emotions are still too raw and are better off in the pages of a journal than getting in between you and your loving W.

Past is past. Not to invalidate your feelings, but leave them where they belong, and focus on actions you can take today based on your current reality.