Dealing with a WW and trying to save myself pt. 4

[SoTorn]

SoTorn:
My XW was so full of pride that it was a sticking point in our MR. A year after BD and D, she recognized that she was an egotistical beach and admits that she had no right to be so full of herself. It took her hitting rock bottom... and like yours, my XW always had perfect credit. Now she would be lucky to get approved for a library card.

TJT:
You’re not screwed. I will say dating was a challenge for me due to some circumstances unique to my situation, but it was not impossible at all. And as you know, my XW asked me for a second chance, yet there are days I feel like I deserve more. I just know that if I didn’t give her a second chance I’d regret it. But for real, in a year there’s a good chance you will be able to look back and wonder what you were thinking when you thought you’d be better off taking him back.

Ya I wouldn't put anything past her at this point. But the only thing under both of our names is the house. I can afford to lay it if I have to.

Again I have financial goals. By the end of February I will have my credit card that I used for the investigator paid off, my car sold and zero debt for myself. That way I can easily afford a nice cheaper yet fast car lol and to either live in MH or on my own. I am going to hold myself to the original goal of March. I can get situated by then and if there is no positive from WW at all I will move out.

If I can get situated financially a little quicker I will move that date up a bit. I'm ready to live my life. I have a lot to do and a lot to offer. I feel like WW is an anchor that I am dragging through tar right now. Even letting go emotionally the attachments I have to her are holding me back from my true potential.

It really [censored] she did this right now because I was offered a chance to move to our corporate office at work to further my career. I cant do that now because I am not forfeiting my custody of the kids. WW tried to talk me into it. I told her that there was no way in hell I was going to just up and leave for 9 months when my kids custody is on the line.

So D16 told me that she spoke with WW while WW is in Vegas. WW complained to her that she was staying home on NYE because "everyone" was giving her a hard time about ditching the kids.

Funny thing is nobody said jack about whether they cared if she was gone or not.

The only thing that I said when WW asked if I was going out on NYE was that I was electing to spend it with my children because they are important.

S11 told me that he had told WW that she never does anything with them. He told WW that I am the only one that keeps them busy. WW told him "oh dads just doing this now because of blah blah" so S11 told her "no dad has been doing stuff with us since you started ignoring us and going out of town 1.5 years ago".

WW has it in her mind that I am "only now" concerned about spending time with the kids. WW has convinced herself that it was someone else taking care of our family for the last 1.5 years that she has withdrawn from us.

It's so nuts that they literally create their own story lines. For example, WW has hit me several times when arguing over the last few years. That was a new thing. But if I brought it up she literally says "that never happened" NPD full steam ahead.

I am glad that she is returning the NC.

It's so weird reading all of the sitches. There are those that detach with abundant love and are acting as BFF to the WW. Then those that go NC like me. I am being cordial because that's all I want to be. I read some people jump at invitations to go to dinner or family outings. Why would one do this when their WW is in an A? What is the point. WW isnt going to notice anything I am doing for her or me being loving if she has a boyfriend.

It's also funny that WW travels to go meet her lover but then says stuff like "people think I'm a POS" or "everyone's complaining I'm not home"


Well uh, WW, you are continuing POS behavior and you are not home. So if it makes you feel guilty or bad why the hell do you do it? Good God. I would assume the OM is digging his claws in as deep as possible. Keeps feeding her BS to help her justify what she is doing.

It's also right out of the wayward textbook that suddenly her close friends are all wayward women, free spirits or people going through D.