I didn't shoot her down about having R talk--she asked me WHEN I would like to have it. So ball is in my court--haven't chosen a date yet
I will do my best not to reason or turn into a blubbering mess. Done begging and pleading.
I think that mostly (from the little I have read, so please forgive me if I am way off here), She might be feeling a little differently than she was just a few months ago.
Even though she hates it, you are validating her now, and maybe she feels "heard" a bit more..
Most of that is because you are different on most accounts, or at least showing signs of being different.
I think a lot of WAS gain energy from being angry, and that mostly comes from the LBS not being who they need them to be , or at least made them out to be.
I often liken it to the space shuttle theory. Pulling away from the LBS is hard for them as well (even if they don't show that to you), and what fuels their journey, is their anger. The harder they pull, the more fuel that they need, kinda like the shuttles used the bigger tanks that broke away once they reach their cruising speed.
As far as the R talk, please don't expect things to be one way or another. Expectations are killer through your stand for your marriage. Positive ones, yet especially the negative ones. Be prepared for things to go either way during those talks, but don't have pre-determined thoughts about which way it will go.
Don't forget, mostly, she will need for you to become the person that she wants you to be( or better yet, the guy she told her friends that you are), in order to justify her actions and decisions.
And when you aren't that guy, she will probably try and make you into that guy by any means possible. watch for the switch during your talk, and IF you aren't giving her what she wants to hear, you will see it. Might not happen, yet be prepared for it.
Prepare yourself for every scenario, yet don't fuel the conversation. Listen, validate, and I like what R2C said above.
Your sitch will change when you start acting, rather than RE-acting....
