Pain... are you being rude? Remember...if you are going to be business-like, you should treat her like you would a business partner or a neighbour. Ask yourself... if my business partner were to send me that kind of a list, would I let that person know that I had received it? I'm pretty sure I would. I think you are forgetting that your WW is confused and in her own kind of pain. Yes, she is causing you pain as well but is it as calculating and vindictive as you seem to think it is? I keep thinking about DnJ's famous mantra... Choose better, not bitter. What are you choosing?
Anyway... that's my two cents. Of course, I only read one side of things and I don't know your WW. Certainly vulgar names are not okay. To me, it just sounds like both of you are really, really hurting which is the fuel that is feeding the anger you both have towards one another. Drop the rope...with love. Give her the space she needs to figure herself out. Give yourself that space too. If not for your WW's sake or your sake, then for your beautiful daughter's sake. She needs both of you to be there for her and not wrapped up in a bitter feud. I KNOW how much this hurts. I am right there with you. I loved my H as much as I loved anyone and he tossed that aside after 13 years as if it meant NOTHING. That HURTS like H3LL!!! But it is not going to destroy me or turn me into a person that my kids would be ashamed of. Kids learn by example and pay attention to what you do, not what you say. Show your D the best Pain you can be. Choose better! (((Pain)))
That is a great analogy, DV6. She is my business partner. I need to acknowledge that I got the communication. I told WW as such during the call.
I know WW is hurting to some extent. I am still trying to accept the fact that she is in pain. My thoughts are "she brought this upon herself." But I also know that this was a result of our MR up to BD.
And I coaxed her to tell me what she is calling me. So she responded. It hurt, but I validated and told her that I will do a better job communicating.
Originally Posted by Ready2Change
Originally Posted by SoTorn
Why does she need you to tell her how D4 is doing? Can't she ask D4? Your WW is temp checking you like mad, she is trying to manipulate you with her feelings regardless if they are valid or not. Just tell her "I understand that its frustrating, I am busy". Maybe something like that? That is how I responded. It is no longer a priority for us to respond instantaneously to WW every time they ring the bell.
Exactly.
Pain,
My understanding is that you are "Nesting" with your wife. You are both in the same house, but one parent is "Scarce" while the other parent is parenting. Correct me if I am wrong.
You are still walking on egg shells with your W.
I am. I try to be home as little as possible, but my 9-5 makes me scarce. I parent on weekends and evenings. You are not wrong.
And you are right about the egg shell part. But I also cannot stomp on them because that's a passive-aggressive tactic NGS use.
