So this morning I woke up, and felt really great. I played with the kids and then I headed out for my IC appointment.
We talked about some of the stuff I mentioned in my journal yesterday, and I feel like I have found a path to walk, and that calms me, because I have felt like I have been standing still, or walking in circles for a long time now. Solution orientated state of mind is what I need to remind myself of all the time. I have had a habit of thinking about, why does this happen, how do I fix it, and could I had done something to avoid it? <-- All a waste of energy, waste of time and waste of mental processing that should be used on healing and growing me. Is this an epiphany of sorts? Hardly, I just think I was now ready to realize it.
I found a quote in the newcomers veteran archive and it just sums up everything so very nicely for me, so I hope others can benefit from it as well: "If you are out driving your car, and suddenly you have a flat tire, you have two options.
Option 1: You stand around wondering what caused the flat tire, was it a nail on the road or another sharp object, was it a bad valve, was it something related to the rims that caused the problem? Wondering about this will not get you back on the road and to wherever you have plans on going to.
Option 2: You realize you have a flat tire, you call road assistance, and within the hour, you are at the service station, and they will tell you what caused the incident and get you back on the road, so you can be where you need to be.
You see, I was option 1 for a very long time, and still find myself slipping there on occasion, I am however beginning to act like option 2 more and more, and that is what will cause me to find my way through this.
Tonight im going to the cinemas with my brother in law watching Aquaman. In half an hour I will be going to the driving range, and this afternoon I have a coffee appointment with my neighbor.
Tomorrow morning I am going fishing with my cousin and yep, life is great, at least its getting there slowly but steady.
BD: Wife says "its over" 11th august 2018. EA: June 2018 PA: August 2018 - ongoing Status: Taking turns 7 days a week to be in the house w. kids WW: no regrets, seems happy with leaving.
