I think the level of contact depends on what financial or logisticals need to be communicated and the nature of the contact depends on what you need to heal. The first (finances/logistics) you can’t avoid if it raises its ugly head. You need to respond because that is what being a grown up means, the second is really up to you. I have kids, so going dark was never an option but I would level my response depending on what I could handle at the time. In the early days it was simply, yes/no or nothing at all. Now I add hello and thank you, the odd ‘hope you’re well’. It is never more friendly than that. He tries to extend the conversation but I think it feels false. If we can’t be friendly I real life, then why pretend on text.
They really don’t know what they want. Until they do, leave them to it. Do what you need to stop their every action from sending you into a spin. Easier said then done. Detach, detach, detach.
