Moving from Newbie status to LBS of MLCr

[job]

Grace,

If your h has been exhibiting signs of a crisis for a long time, it could very well be that he actually never grew up at all. This can happen if they aren't allowed to go through the growth spurts, i.e., quarter life crisis when they came along. For example, we all navigate those growth spurts at the early ages of the teens, 20's, 30's, etc. If we aren't allowed to navigate them and complete them, then a full blown crisis takes place later in life.

My xh was one of those who didn't navigate his quarter life's and when he hit the 40's...it became a full blown crisis. He never grew up and he's still out there acting like a young adult. Will he grow up? I seriously doubt that he will because he wants a momma to take care of him and he's quite comfortable not wanting responsibility.

You will know when you've had enough and need to move on. No one can tell you this. You are the one living this experience day in and day out. For those who are still married and/or separated, they come here asking the same questions, but find that if they can take each hour, each day as one day at a time, they can survive. They have been given the gift of time to re-explore what they want to do, they have time to complete those hobbies and tasks that have been put on the back burner for so long, they have time to look within and if they aren't happy w/something about themselves, they can begin fixing those issues and above all else...they learn to love themselves again. We are fixers and planners...and the one thing that I learned is that I can't fix everything and the planner was tossed out years ago. We learn not to sweat the small stuff and most importantly, we learn to laugh again and live our lives to the fullest.

Grace, you are more than welcome to walk this path w/us. We will pick you up if you fall. Dig deeper for patience and keep the focus on you.