Obviously I still think about her and the entire situation(a lot) but I've been reading and I've realized a lot of mistakes.
Totally normal to devote a lot of headspace to the WAS. Getting out and GAL'ing will help with that, but it does take time. I had to really, REALLY force myself to GAL. I just wanted to sit at home and wallow in misery. I really HATED GAL at first, it didn't help at all. But little by little I found myself starting to take pleasure in things and eventually I was having fun and acting like my normal self again. Sure I was still sad about my sitch, but I started to realize I was going to survive no matter what and hope started blossoming inside me. Once that process starts it tends to snowball and before you know it you are an awesome force to be reckoned with. There's something about coming out the other side of this miserable hell that makes you feel like there is literally nothing life can throw at you that you can't crush with an iron fist.
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I've been running, studying for the GMAT, and I think I'm up for a promotion at the start of the year.
Excellent. Try to pick up more GAL activities that put you in with other people, especially men. When we get married we tend to drop our guy friends. Hanging out with guys has a way of triggering your alpha behavior again.
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My WAW leaves to California for the Xmas break tomorrow.
Should I text her and tell her to have a good time and be safe? Or is it best not to?
So I text her on Christmas?
And lastly her birthday is in the next few weeks, should I text her happy birthday?
Well you'll get different responses on this, some will tell you that if you're dark then just don't contact her at all. Personally I tend to think if you don't say anything then it appears to the WAS like you're cold/indifferent or even angry. You don't want her think you're doing things to try and get her back, whether it's trying to "nice" her back by going overboard on gifts and ILY or "mean" her back by being cold and elusive. So my attitude is try and strike a compromise in there. Don't buy her gifts, but I think texting her Happy Birthday or Merry Christmas isn't out of line as long as you just do it and forget it and not expect a lengthy convo (if she replies in kind then don't reply back).
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My work offers a program where you can seek therapy and they pay for x amount of services. I found a local therapist and unfortunately she isn’t available until mid Jan. This counseling won’t be for couple or relationship advice but more to treat anxiety. And I know that term gets thrown around so much lately but I do feel that it can help me. I want the best advice I can get on how to manage my thoughts.
Absolutely, do it! Mid-January isn't that far off. A couple of weeks probably seems like forever to you right now but nothing will change that soon, this is a marathon!
