[Wanted1]

W,

You are three months in and believe me when I tell you that you are no way close to being detached.

I have this sneaky suspicion that you thought you would get a reaction from her when she found the papers.

Just remember that her filing for D is not necessarily the end of the story.

I know that it should and will take me longer than 3 months to detach. I think I thought I was further along than I really am. I do want to claim a slight victory in that I believe I am on the right path. The papers being gone didn't send me into a downward spiral like it probably would have done had it happened a month ago. I just feel uneasy. Not shellshocked, scared or full of fear. I wish detaching was a quicker process than it appears to be. I suppose everyone feels that way though!

I honestly did not do it to get a reaction from her one way or another. She told me they were there and that 'IF I wanted to get the 60 day cool down period started, I could sign them and scan and email them to her and she would file them." Notice the turnaround as though it is ME wanting to file? I never got a response from her when I requested her thoughts and feelings on whether or not SHE wanted to file right away. I told her I would not stand in the way anymore and I don't intend to. Set her free, right? So, I signed the papers and put them right back where she left them. I feel like if I wanted a reaction, I would have told her that I signed them. That is something Wanted1.0 would have done probably. Sort of a 'let's see who blinks first' type of a game. I also didn't scan and email them to her as she originally requested. My thought process on this was I will sign what I need to and then the ball is in her court. She is now free to do as she pleases, whether that be to file or hold them for awhile. I am not going to acknowledge to her that I know they are gone either.

I do know that her filing isn't the end of the story. Just another step in the perceived inevitable direction. Part of me feels like she is SO guarded with me on how she feels about everything and is SO determined to not give me ANY sneaking suspicion of her hesitation that she might file them immediately so there isn't any perception that she might still be unsure. I don't know. Need to stop trying to read minds. I guess her filing doesn't mean she isn't still unsure either. We still have to wait 60 days minimum for anything to be final anyway. Things could change after filing, but I have zero expectations that they will.

Journaling....

WW told me 10 days ago (via text) that the initial pleadings she drew up were in a drawer in our MH

Now, this morning, I went to the drawer to see if the papers were still in there and they are gone. I think she was tidying up the surrounding area and put some more stuff in the drawer that was left out and noticed them.

She knew where they were.

Yes she knew where they were because she put them there. I don't think she knew I had signed them yesterday. There's literally no way that she could have known.