Reading your thread triggers my anger with my X when she was doing the same Cr4p 10 years ago. She is dragging you and your kids through the mud.
If you see it again, something like this might be needed:
H:"W, When you make other things more important than saying goodbye to our kids on their birthdays, I start questioning if you realize how much that hurts them.....If I see this again I will ...
"What is best for my kids is best for me" Amor Fati Link to quotes: https://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2879712