MLC husband

[roist]

Hello.

Welcome to this super place. Sorry that you are here. You have gotten some good advice to start with. Read as much as you can here. Knowledge is powerful. You will make mistakes. We all do, but hopefully this site will help you avoid making more.

IMO, counseling is of no benefit now. Unless he is inboard or even open to it, it will not have any chance of working, or v little chance. In your shoes I would drop it. Don't mention it again and if H brings it up tell him you have changed your mind about it. But you could see someone on your own if you think it could help.

I would just add that before you start your journey be clear about your motivation. Many LBS have a knee jerk reaction to save the M just because they realise they are about to lose it. Understandable but you need to explore the question deeper to be clear why you want to stand. Knowing that truly will help resist when the going gets tough.

And I agree that you should know your boundaries and what actions that will occur if crossed. Standing does not mean accepting everything until they come around. In fact that is counter productive.

Lastly I remind you that you have time. Do not rush in on your white horse in metal armour to saveyour M. Sometimes doing nothing is the best action. In the beginning we put ourselves under pressure to do something now NOW, before itis too late. Nothing can turn this around immediately. There is no magic switch. You can only win this in the long term. I know that is hard to hear and almost impossible to heed but if you can listen it could save you from some mistakes.

Best wishes