Letting Go. Detaching. Done Engaging.

[Did]

W came to pick up D4 to take her to school came early as we were eating. Brief convo. Talked schedule first.

Went over christmas plans with D4. I said then when she gets done all that I’ll have a present for you and christmas here. (Makes 3 christmases) w said something about spoiled and a lot of presents and favoritism. Didn’t say it in a mean way but next year we should discuss so it’s even. Next year planning on being separated / divorce that still hurts.

W wanted to make sure I was still able to get D4 fri am because she has a hair appt. her friend who cuts hair is about to go on maternity leave so this is like a huge important thing in her mind. Figure she has a date fri even though I don’t know and shouldn’t be thinking about it.

Then I feel like sht about this one. Towards the end of the time w says did you remember what yesterday was I didn’t want to mention it or cause stress. Our anniversary. Want to text her saying I feel bad about forgetting our anniversary. But that will not bring me any closer to my goals so posting here.

Again I feel worse being around her. I’m not going to put myself in these situations anymore. Anyway feeling pretty low. Her words affect me too much and I can’t believe what she says. I know I know