[I’m paraphrasing what happened, since it happened right before I went to sleep]
I’m getting ready for bed around 11:00, and I walk into MBR, and W is folding her laundry (she does her laundry, I do mine, and either of us do laundry for the boys, depending on the day).
I hop into bed, say ‘goodnight.’ W: Are you going to help, or are you that tired that you just need to go straight to bed.
Me: [takes about 10 seconds to think through response] Okay I can put away a couple of things if you need me to
W: (clearly agitated) You don’t need to be all p***ed off about it, if you don’t want to you can just go to bed.
She admitted that she needed some help, and I did put away a couple of her items, and then went to sleep.
I should have either just said ‘goodnight’ and went to sleep, or just helped her. One of my triggers with her is her accusing me of getting p****ed off about things, when I don’t think I react like that (could what I do / say come across that way? Maybe). But I knew enough to not escalate it, because in the past I would say something like ‘I’m really not p****ed off, but that reaction does get me p****ed off.’ That’s one of the things about her that really bugs me—like she’s mind-reading me, and she seemed clearly agitated.
