13 years and 2 kids pt. 3.

[LH19]

I, Two steps forward, one step back.

I told her, and my voice was apparently angry since she accused me for lecturing her. I said that was not my intention, but I had no quarrels sticking it to her straight, when it comes to the best of our kids interest.

If you are going to do it then do it without any apologies!

I then said, if I had done this, if I had wrecked our life as we knew them, then I would had moved out because that is indeed the right thing to do in order for all of us to move on.

These are just words to try to make her feel guilty. This doesn't work.

I have been talking to some "officials" don't know the name in US, about children and how the perceive their parents leaving like she has been doing. I told her, that it had been anonymous, and that I had no intentions of harming her, I just want whats best for our kids.

Again words and then apologies. Why bring it up?

I then said I thought of her as a great mother for her children,

WTF??? A woman who leaves her kids for days to spend time with another man while married is a great mother????

I kinda accidentally talked a bit about how OM and her were being a thing for days, and then she would come home and try to eat cake, and it was wrong - thats why we needed this to end, by her moving out.

Well it sounds like you kinda accidentally set a boundary? Sounds like she's not moving out. What are the consequences?

She agreed to go and not comeback until tuesday. I thanked her,

You fuching thanked her for going to visit another man and not comeback until Tuesday?WTF????

and said, that I meant no harm for her and the kids relationship, but this was the best way for all of us to get some space and distance, and I said that these were the things that she had said she needed multiple times, so now she need to act on it. I also told her, that none of this had to do with her "new life".

Again, is this a boundary?

I didn't want to stand in her way, and honestly (which it is at this point in time), I don't really want anything from her.
So are you giving her permission to be with OM?

I[quote=Hurt213] I am looking forward to having a great weekend with the kids.

Great! That is awesome!!

I am sure, I most likely hurt my sitch by talking about OM and her (dumb and emotional reactions took me there).

IMO you didn't hurt it you just didn't help it.

I am glad I told her, that I don't want this for the kids, and that its best for us to stay apart and get space.

Again, is this a boundary.

Come on IH you are so confused on what you are suppose to be doing. You have to participate in trying to save yourself and protect your kids.