[Wanted1]

it does give me some peace of mind knowing that even if my W sounds dead set on pushing through to D, there is the possibility that down the road she might realize she screwed up.

Good, and let the peace of mind help you heal. Apparently there are a LOT of stories about the dead-set ones coming back. At least that's what I tell myself for my own peace of mind.

Check out Joe2017's latest posts, classic example. He got BD'd 11-2017. His W steamrolled the D process and they were divorced February of this year. Had almost no contact for 6 months and now she has approached him expressing grief, sorrow, repentance, has asked his forgiveness and is begging him for another chance. If you go back and look at the 3rd or 4th page of his first thread you'll see me (and others) there saying the exact same stuff I say to most people here. Time, space, patience. I told him not to expect a turnaround in weeks or months, that it would take a year or more.

I don't have a crystal ball but what I do have is a lot of time here seeing a lot of situations play all the way out. Most of you are only a few months past BD and you think it's the end of the world because all you see is the pain and grief. But when you've been here for years like me and some of the others, you see there are some really spectacular things that happen AFTER the pain and grief. Transformed lives. Changed people. Unexpected recons. IT HAPPENS ALL THE TIME. You just haven't been here long enough to see it and believe in it.

Yep, I’m on his 3rd thread now. What you were writing to him back then sounded awfully similar to what I’ve heard from you here. I’m preparing for the long haul, but in the meantime going to focus on me and getting through the pain, grief and utter devastation. That’s priority #1 along with continuing to detach and move on. I understand I need to let her go and do whatever it is she has to do. If that means signing the D papers to get it started, I’ll oblige.

Thanks again for always checking in on me.