13 years and 2 kids pt. 3.

[Hurt213]

Early morning reflections:

Good morning .

I was sitting this morning, reflecting, adding and crossing over goals on my 180 list.

I came to wonder about the following. So the general advice on here, has been to not give WW the cake-eating opportunity of spending time with me, when the kids are sleeping - meaning that whenever kids sleep, and we are in the house together, I go to another room and avoid spending time with her. I have been doing that every night that I have been home going to MBR and work / read / relax or go to bed early.

Now I came to wonder. One of the things, that WW told me on more than on occasion was: "I wanted to spend time with you, but you prioritized everything and everyone else", "I just wanted to sit on the couch with you and watch a movie, but you never found time, or always had an apology", "I wanted to cuddle up in blankets with you in the livingroom, but you never wanted to, and always refused saying it was too warm or you didn't feel like it".

I can see how not giving her cake-eating opportunities with me as long as she is with another man makes the most sense. But I also think, she told me straight up, what she really was longing for, and what I didn't provide, and definitely do not at this time.

I just came to think about those statements, and then wanted to be absolutely sure, that I do continue this path (I think I do?), but I haven't shared that info before about her statements, so I just want to be sure. <-- My own interpretation is, that it would be crazy beta, to engage in couch coziness and chats with a person that left me and destroyed our family for another dude, on the vague grounds that she provided for leaving? I don't wanna be beta .