Weathering the storm (pain18 DB VIII)

[Wanted1]

They think they have to act mad, cold. and rude.

I am struggling with the items in bold. Anger has been my primary emotion these last two months. Anger and vindictiveness.

Forgiveness is key. Forgiving is not forgetting.

Lookup "radical forgiveness" by colin tipping

I bought that book about a month ago. Haven't opened it. I would be more than willing to read it had my W decided that she wanted to, at the very least, try to make our M work. Now that it's pretty clear she doesn't, forgiving her isn't high on my priority list. I don't know if that's the right mindset to have right now, but I don't really care. That's how I feel and I don't think I need to be at the stage where I should forgive her for the turmoil and devastation she has caused. Destroying 2 friendships with 2 of my best friends and then now destroying my family in the path of her destructive storm doesn't scream forgiveness for me yet. Maybe someday I will, but now is not the time. I want to put all my focus and efforts on detaching, moving on and healing myself. What she has put me through seems unforgivable right now. But I know feelings are fleeting and that over time, I might decide differently.