I am still amazed at my W's ability to ignore me, like I never existed, like a shadow, like a ghost or a thing that was/ has vanished into oblivion
It is amazing how they can suddenly just switch us off, like all those years we spent planning, and hoping and building a life didn't mean anything. All I can say is that use this time to work on you. I see my H all the time. It is no easier and sometimes I wish I did not see him. At least if I did not see him he could not set the temperature. My life wouldn't be ruled by his moods.
All I can say is that you have a blank slate at the moment. Use it to create the life you want to live.
Originally Posted by krull
... And here I am talking to myself.
This is the outcome of what they refer to here as 'cheeseless tunnels'. Those horrible thoughts that run round and round in your mind until you can't sleep, you can't think and you can't function properly. This is grief, and it is normal. When they come, acknowledge, them, feel the pain and then let them go. This is where GAL comes in. If you are out doing stuff, then the thoughts will be less likely to make an appearance. It will feel forced at first and you will not really be present but eventually you will come to enjoy them. Reading is good, but it is a solitary experience and it is too easy to see yourself in them.
The other thing is journal. Write about your sitch, ask for advice but also write about the trip you took to the store to buy books, the meal you had for dinner or the new coffee shop you found. Making this a habit will help you to live more in the present. Doesn't matter if it's a long post. Doesn't matter if it seems mundane. Doesn't matter if it's well written or not. People here will read it because the wonderful people here care.
