Getting Mixed Signals - New Thread

[Living]

Living,

Before you go through with this I want to make it absolutely clear that you go into this with ZERO expectations that it will not change anything.

In all likely hood it will just reinforce to him that you are on the hook as plan B.

Thank you for your honest opinion. I truly appreciate it. I haven’t made a final decision regarding this. I’m waiting on the book the Art of Seduction because I truly want to read it. I do enjoy teasing him though. I know that’s sinister but it’s fun.

At this point I don’t think I have any expectations when it comes to me H. He’s a mess. His actions show he’s a mess. He’s admitted that he’s going through something. I was sort of glad to hear him admit this. I’ve been reading a lot about MLC and I’m coming to the realization that he’s not intentionally hurting me. He’s in pain and hurt people hurt those closest to them. I’m not excusing any of his behavior. I’m just starting to realize that he truly is going through something. I see him everyday so I see it written all over his face. I’m also sure he’s dealing with both anxiety and depression.

I think I expected him to act out even worse than he already has. I expected him to go hang out in bars, to not come directly home from work or to not come home at all, to go sleep with a random woman, to come home sloppy drunk, to go out and make a irresponsible expensive purchase, to start drinking heavily, to pack his things and move out. However, he hasn’t done any of those things. He goes to work and then comes straight home. When I go GAL on the weekends, he’s left at home by himself. On one hand that’s a good thing. Because it shows him what life would be like without me. On the other hand, maybe that gives him some space and time to really think about things. I’m not sure. All I know is he is staying very close to home base. He’s also promised that he’s not going to go out and cheat. So far he’s living up to that.

That’s what makes things so freaking confusing. He says one day he wants out of the marriage and then if I stop talking to him, he can’t handle it. I think me moving him out of the MBR opened his eyes some. He never expected that I would do that in a million years. He’s now back to he wants us to try to figure things out. He initiated that conversation not me.

So does it give me some hope that he’s not out doing crazy things? Yes it does! But I haven’t decided if I’ll give into the temptation and sleep with him or not. I’ll just admit it isn’t easy because there are times when my body wants to.

Right now he’s acting very sweet. Telling me he loves me daily. He makes sure he looks me dead in the eyes when he says it. He also makes sure that I’m looking him in the eye when he says it. I don’t say it back because I know it’s against the rules. I just look at him. He says that he just wants me to know and believe that he truly loves me. Yesterday he also thanked me out of the blue for not giving up on him. I didn’t really respond, I just looked at him.