Pain, I could be totally wrong here but reading the last couple posts I think you may be overthinking cake eating a bit with things like the food. There is a difference between NGS and being a nice person and some of the things you do are because you are a nice person and there is nothing wrong with that at all. The best way it was described to me is to treat them like they are a distant friend that is staying at your place. You need to eat so you cook dinner, maybe a little extra for your house guest, no big deal you don't need to tell her she can't eat the extra food. From what I think a more alpha male would do, come home with a plan, tonight I want "X" for dinner and make it. Maybe or maybe not casually mention to W there is extra dinner if she would like and leave it at that. Sit down and enjoy your meal as if W isn't even there. If she wants to join you at the table she can, or she can eat somewhere else, or she can choose to not eat at all. Either way you don't care. Worst case she doesn't eat and you have leftovers for lunch at work tomorrow.
