R678. So sorry you are feeling this way. I know too well what that feels like. I would not wish this on my worst enemy. I concur with everything MarvinF said. IC would help. An antidepressant might be a temporary help as well. I have a friend who went through something similar and she says that was what helped her in her sitch. As tough as it is, you need to start getting out there and doing some things for yourself. Do you have any meetup groups in your area? Google it to see. I have a couple and I forced myself to go out last week on a hike with one of the groups and enjoyed it despite my reluctant mindset. Last night I went to a fundraiser and had a great time. I was feeling quite down before I left but made myself go. Again, I enjoyed it despite myself. I also bought myself a guitar last week and bought some online beginner lessons. I’ve always wanted to learn so it is something I can work on when my mind starts going down unwanted paths. I am also planning a New Year’s Eve party with a few friends. Do I feel like hosting? Not really. But I know it is a way more enjoyable alternative to sitting at home by myself wondering what my H is up to. A cheeseless tunnel, IMO. As hard as it is, and I KNOW it is hard, you just have to fake it until you make it. If you are consistent, you will find that you are feeling a bit better, in spite of yourself. Do not be afraid to let go. When you let go, you will find yourself again. (((R678)))
