Do I sit and be patient, do I start putting my foot down regarding future expectations, or is there something completely different that I should explore?
I don't usually interject when sandi is involved because she is far more advance on this stuff than I am. But I really think that you are in a much better place than you think. I think your only problem is when you stop DBing.
Trying for sex and getting shot down? Then getting upset about it? That is newbie level,and RR you are far above newbie level. One of the top rules of DBing is DO NOT INITIATE SEX. It is similar to saying ILY. After BD newbies start saying ILY like a madman. All that does is remind the WAW that she DOESN'T love her H. Same with initiating sex. All that did was remind her that she isn't attract to you like that right now.
I am going to channel sandi here: Lack of attraction is rooted in a lack of respect. So instead of worrying about how to get attraction back, you have to learn how to get your respect back. And just because she is acting respectful doesn't mean she respects you! Are you respectful to the cashier at the store? Would you say you have a great deal of respect for that cashier? See the difference.
RR, if I were you, I'd double-down on the DBing. GAL like a madman. Make her see that you have a rich life outside of the MR. Continue your 180s, cement them to the point where she learns to trust them. And continue to detach. You know how I know you still aren't detached? Getting shot down for sex and reacting badly. A detached H gets shot down for sex and acts as if nothing ever happened.
RR you've got this. Keep DBing. You've seen positive results so far, don't give up now!
M(53), W(54),D(19) M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018
