T So 1. I really think I "react responded" to her mail yesterday. And I like the response, that Steve wrote as an example: Would it be bad / wrong of me, to say that I slept on the matter, and that this is what I came up with (insert Steves response and then finish it with, that I think that it is best, if she doesn't attend my birthday with the kids, since it isn't something we should do together anymore" <--- I have to answer her regarding tomorrow anyways, but yea, I need some vet advice here please.
No, do not go back and try to fix things in DBing. Usually it is a bad idea. We all make mistakes. The key is to pick up from that point and do better moving forward. Think about it like this: If you said too much originally, saying more can't help you. Just learn from it, move forward and do better in the future.
Originally Posted by Hurt213
So I don't know how to respond to that.. I read it like "So I kinda blew my cover yesterday and showed you that this is hard on me, so today I need to be firm and show you, that I have no remorse, and want to just get the house ready and get it sold asap". This is of course my interpretation and maybe its nothing like that, but I need advice on how to respond to both cases, and I would love to do that in just 1 text, so I don't come off as needy with multiple texts and I really don't want a conversation with her.
Your read on this is exactly correct!! This is classic WW behavior. "I let my guard down so now I have to do something to prove how serious I am about this marriage being over!"
My WW did something very similar. After letting her guard down one day early in our sitch and showing she was having 2nd thoughts, 4 days later she subscribed to an online dating site and put a full profile up including picture and a detailed description of her status (married but looking, though can't date right now). While they are still wayward they will always respond to moments of weakness and wanting to say with rebellion against the MR.
General rule: If she texts you a question. Take your time (make her wait) and answer with as few words as possible (yes or no questions get a simple yes or no). If it isn't a question (IE informational) just don't respond at all.
Hurt, you are way too focused on her. And her words. Drop that focus. Focus on you and the kids. Treat her like the cashier at the store. (I assume you've heard that analogy before.)
M(53), W(54),D(19) M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018
