OK here goes first post... pt 5

[FlySolo]

David - Google Separate Dads UK. There are a lot of forums for dads in the UK who are going through what you are going through. Slightly different to this forum as the focus is on access and legal rights, but you might be able to get some targeted advice on there.

A couple of week ago I did a 180 and I sent a message to W on eldests birthday with a pic of their 1st birthday. I put Today is to celebrate ******* birth. I was there at your side throughout holding your hand and supporting you as our baby entered the world. It was the birth of our family. We shared the special moment. That is what life is about. I hope that you get the time and space to figure it out before too long as every moment is precious and those moments are being lost. Forgiveness is a decision. I want to do the right thing, do you? I got back a message back saying it was a wonderful miracle day and that she was 'truly completely utterly grateful for that'.

Your W has to get to a place where she remembers this on her own. Force feeding memories to her will only push her further away. She will see it as emotional blackmail and manipulation and will only resent you for it. Stop. Let her get to a place where she feels safe remembering these things (on her own). She is not in the mind frame to remember right now.

6 months of separation and suddenly I feel like I've hit a wall because I miss passion, affection and love.

We all hit this wall. But it will pass. Or it won't and you will move on. Either way, you will be fine.

I feel sad that W has gone so low being dishonest in the things she has done; sad for her and the kids. I wonder how much longer I can wait hoping that she will realise what she's done wrong.

... it will likely take more than 6 months. Marathon, not sprint. Only you know when you have run for a long enough.

I feel like calling her out saying that she has been deceptive for years and my gut feeling that she wasn't committed was right. Any advice?

Advice - don't. What good would it do? Your W will only deny everything or turn it around and blame you. Either way, you will end up feeling [censored].