So I am having a difficult time figuring out the following: 1. I have been advised to show WW, that she has pushed this MR over the cliff, and that I am not interested in R (partially true, I feel a "something" growing inside of me, that has had it with her behaviour, the way she treats me and the way she from time to time chooses OM over her kids). So I am doing GAL activities as much as I can, I am doing a lot of stuff with my kids, that would have included her previously (yea she still tries to be part of these things, but I let her know by my body expressions, that this is a we (me and the kids) thing, and not a she thing.
So everyday is a little easier, also because she is deeply involved with OM and doesn't seem to want to change that, she just want her cake-eating on the side, and its repulsing.
The part where I get really confused about my behavioral patterns is the following: So according to the above, and according to the great advice from some of the vets on here, I am to show her, that I have had it, that we are done, and that cake-eating has stopped (the bakery is closed!). <-- This I have been faking for months (yes, I can't switch off from day to day), but as stated, I find myself thinking differently about her, noticing some of the things she ACTUALLY does, instead of reminiscing over all the good things she DID. This makes me GAL, retreat to MBR and generally I don't speak with her, when the kids are not around. She texts me daily, she sends me social media messages daily, and I don't reply, unless it is about the kids. She texted me 8 times yesterday, about random stuff, I just ignore it (basically, I don't even know why she texts me at this point in time - temp check most likely).
But then I am also seeing the advice to be AMOAFWL, and that includes validating, listening, and being kind around WW. This is where the confusion sets in. Because, it comes natural at this point, to just walk around, not looking at her, not smiling at her, only answering her in short sentences, which I believe make me look like a grumpy old grandpa. I don't see how that makes me a AMOAFWL. I got a lot to learn, and im ready to fake it till I make it, however I need some guidance on this part. I am actually enjoying the space I have created between us, as it makes my daily day so much easier. I don't have to pay notice to whenever she texts frantically with whom I already know who is, in the couch next to me. I don't have to talk about random things with a woman, that put my family into ruins, and I enjoy, retreating to MBR, and just do me, watch a movie I want to watch for example.
Advice pretty please .
BD: Wife says "its over" 11th august 2018. EA: June 2018 PA: August 2018 - ongoing Status: Taking turns 7 days a week to be in the house w. kids WW: no regrets, seems happy with leaving.
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