Weathering the storm (pain18 DB VIII)

[burned]

OK, I like it so far. Keep in mind that one other option, rather than doing the assignment (which I sort of made up as I was writing it) is: you could have told me that I was being hurtful, disrespectful, and that I should go pee on a power line. Once you're confident in yourself, you'll be able to say that to buttheads like me, without really caring what they think, and it will make #1-3 and 5 from List 2 become far less powerful over your feelings and actions.

To List 1, I would add: you are a person willing to go to great lengths to improve yourself. That is a very, very important skill.

Item 4 from List 2 is your weakest link. Target all of your efforts there. Next thing you know, Assignment 4 will become superfluous, because they will still love you and you will love yourself and your actions will just be a byproduct of that connection, not an attempt to make or reinforce the connection.

Major damage control here. I am NOT an NGS coach or anything. I'm trying to get something good out of this, for you.

One thing I should add about anger: I have always been a very angry person. I've spent a lifetime learning how to control it. The harder I try, the more it gets the best of me. I totally know where you're coming from. And I also think that part of what factors into NGS is our own personal fear (perhaps based on past experience) that if we let out ALL of the anger at someone, it will cause an irreparable rift. So it's a double penalty. We fear what will happen if we express the anger. So we hold it in. And then at some point something happens and it all comes out. Then the cycle begins anew. So I think that healthy expression of anger is pretty important for us.