So yesterday after work, I pulled over at the park and I cried the hardest cry I have in the longest time. I cannot believe my marriage has come to this. I cannot believe that this is where I’m at with my H. I mourn the beautiful marriage we had. I mourn the wonderful husband he was. He was my best friend. It still shocks me that he has done the things he’s done. I’ve told my mother, sisters, and best friend what has happened. They are all in shock. They can’t beleve he is acting this way. I hate that the MLC fairies came and stole my loving and wonderful H.
So today I feel so sad. Still taking my power back and proud of that. However, today I feel so sad.
Of course you feel that way! It just means you are caring and sensitive. Embrace that.
You're talking like your H has passed away, which in many ways is not far from the truth. In MLC something happens to people, their personality is so radically different it's very much like dealing with someone who has had a traumatic brain injury. There is good and bad news. The good news is many MLCers do return to their old selves at some point. The bad news is it usually takes many years. So settle in because none of this is likely to change anytime soon.
Regarding him being up and pacing at night, it sounds like he's having anxiety attacks. Maybe that will get better now that he's decided not to move out.
