13 yrs and two kids pt. 2.

[SteveLW]

Hurt, you are getting a lot of good advice. I will say that attending the holiday events may not be a terrible idea. Remember, the less people that know about your sitch, the easier it will be for her if she ever decides to come back to the MR. And less resistance she feels to that the easier it will be for her to make up her mind to try to R with you. But I think if you follow the advice above that will also be very beneficial to you. Remember, you are dealing with a very selfish creature here. Make sure you are protecting yourself. Certainly do not be at her beckon call (IE GAL).

There will be plenty of time later to put your foot down on that kind of stuff though so if you do attend the events it isn't like you are going backwards.

Small talk: Listen and validate. That's it. Do not initiate the small talk yourself.

Listen to LH on the spending time. She wants time and space...give it to her.