Gordie 22 eight months after she dropped the D

[roist]

Gordie,

In your posts I hear you settling for the lesser of two evils, yet resenting it. I can understand that and no one here will blame you for feeling that way.

I also notice a recurrence in your posts over recent months. Maybe that is inevitable idk. My threads had many repeated similarities. Reread your last few threads and see if you notice anything.

Maybe you need to dust off the cobwebs and go back to basics.

You need to ask yourself some probing questions to refind your true reason for standing. Because it's better than D may be true but isn't good enough to help you withstand the strains and frustrations of limbo.

Speaking of those frustrations, do you know where yours are coming from?
# unmet expectations
# lack of progress
# resentment that after all your efforts and time this is all you have
# diminishing hope about the ideal future you had in.mind when you decided to stand
# all of the above?
Only you.can identify this accurately but doing so will.help you.

Have you recently sat down and noted what next baby steps would indicate progress? There were times when I felt things were getting worse in our R but after rereading my mini goals, some progress was still occurring.

Another part of my last point is to notice each day all the positives in your W/M. Never underestimate the power of gratitude. Go a step further and express it more. Not as a tool to achieveimprovement with W (though that could happen) but more so to be a better you

What other self improvements are you working on?

I read recently that people should find joy in the situations they experience: be joyful when it snows. Because whether you are joyful or not, there is the same amount of snow! Go find your joy/happiness.ReRevisit the excel at life site. I always find something helpful.

None of my comments are judging you or your situation.
By now I hope you know that anything I post is only intended to help. You seem a little stuck so I am pushing you to find what you need to live and to thrive, not survive (you have that one covered!!)

Best wishes