Again, your choice, but all of you will live with the consequences of your actions.
This x1000. Just like our MLC spouses a day will come when all of this has passed and we still have to live with ourselves, how we held ourselves up and how we acted when confronted with MLC. OneArt is absolutely correct, both for the kids, and for you, and for the woman you shared your life with.
One day you will look back and you want to be proud of how you were doing the darkest hours and be proud of how your kids learned from you, no?
In reading your posts I sense the pain, the love, the anger, the compassion. Maybe I am wrong. But it is perfectly normal to be in turmoil and experience all of these. Question is which of these are the true Hamburg?