[ Yes, it's not the physical reality of the situation that I'm scared about. It's the perception of dwindling hope, where before, I was sitting here thinking that maybe mentally he is rethinking things or has doubts about going through with it, or giving himself time (just like I was) to fully pull the trigger and call it quits.
What if I told you that in 95.75% of the cases, talking about filing for D is actually an indicator that HE IS RETHINKING THINGS. The WAS is often confused. Especially if the LBS starts to move on. The WAS starts to be eaten up with thoughts of "am I doing the right thing here?" And with most humans, when they start having doubts on something they've convinced themselves they want, they take action.....or the illusion of action. Thus "Hey, I am going to file for D but need your help."
He doesn't need your help to file for D. If he is talking this way likely he has no plans to follow through. So why get yourself worked up over something that might not even happen?!? Especially since he likely knows just mentioning it will send you spiraling. Why let him have that kind of power.
Even if he finally get the gumption to file, then everything else I said is true. What you said makes sense.....IF you are letting emotion and what ifs govern your life. DBing is about taking the what ifs out of the life governing business. How? By putting yourself SQUARELY in the role of governing your life. GAL. 180s. Detachment. They all make you the master of your domain!! So take control of your life by GAL like a mad woman. 180ing and becoming the best person you can be. And most importantly detaching from him emotionally so that he doesn't have so much control over you and your emotions.
TJT, you've got this. You are a strong woman. You do not NEED this man in your life. It is okay to want him in your life, but needing him in your life makes you weak and pathetic....something you certainly are not.
M(53), W(54),D(19) M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018
