[Wanted1]

W,

You are still operating under what is called the "illusion of action" and that you have to do something to get a reaction out of her.

She doesn't care who she hurts that is so obvious.

If you need to do something. DO NOTHING, which is something. Start planning a life for you and the kids and start to formulate in your mind what that life might look like.

Again, you are still waiting for the big decision which has already been determined by her months if not years ago.

Like Neff said, put on your big boys pants move forward in your life, take care of your kids and the rest will take care of itself. Let her file, let her do the heavy lifting.

Well I've sort of already done that. Yesterday I booked a vacation for just myself and the kids in January. Wanted to do this instead of going nuts with Xmas gifts with stuff they don't need. Looking forward to that trip and the kids are super excited as well. We are going with a couple other families, so it should be an awesome time. Will be pretty awkward explaining to the rest of them why W isn't along, if nothing happens in the meantime that will make our situation public, but I'll cross that bridge when I get to it.

Please tell me you've said nothing to her about this trip yet.

I asked the kids whether they wanted Xmas presents or to go on a vacation with friends. They told her as soon as she got home last week.

I then told her after her little conversation with me on Sunday about needing to be kept in the loop somewhat since we have kids together that I will be booking the vacation tomorrow (yesterday). That's all that has been said.