Being a LBS can be exactly like that. You think you're getting better, something happens to remind you you're not. I think for some of us the tooing and froing will be our existence for some time to come. I think you are pretty darn close to being more 'out' than 'in' though. You are one strong woman Yorkie. Don't let a little moment of weakness make you forget it.
PS - If you are thinking about the hokey cokey and you're sober ... what were you like when you had a drink in you ??
