We never know the full story because we on the forums aren't living it. However, everything you have described about your H is that he is a very broken man. I doubt there is or was much you can do for it. You take care of you for him and he takes care of him for you. Unfortunately, he doesn't sound like he is willing or capable to do his work and he may never be willing. To me it sounds like you carry shame for not being able to fix a person that wasn't yours to fix. Find your faults and fix them, be a better version of yourself that's all you can hope for.
Here are 2 quotes for you.
"What doesn't kill you only makes you stronger."
This one is much harsher, but its important for all of us LBS, its one I still struggle with. "He/she was never yours its just your turn."
H(37) W(35) D8, D5, S3 T20, M13 BD 8/31/18 EA Discovered 9/13/18 Mediation 10/3/18 W files for D 10/12/18 W moves out 11/10/18 EA confirmed 12/25/18 D Final 1/10/19
