Well first of all thank you for your military service, done that myself.
You are not going to talk your way out of these marital problems, Learn that actions speak louder than words, And you are only responsible for 50% of the marriage.
Granted that you are 100% responsible for your half, You can't force her to love you.
Love is a choice not a feeling.
It sounds like she has her own issues and you can not FIX her issues. . You have to let go and just work on yourself.
Read up on pursuit and distance and stop pursuing her.
