It looks like you've got lots of really good advice from Sandi and others ... and to be honest, Sandi is far more articulate and much more familiar with the WW than me so I will stick to answering the question you posed to me on Burned's thread re how we went from IHS to MO.
There was no discussion. It was a slow escalation (mostly by me in my angry desperate moods) over a period of three months, and then three months for him to eventually MO. If I had not pushed he wouldn't have gone.
My sitch is different to some of the others here. There was no OW. He did not want to leave (I pushed him). He was just desperately unhappy. I wish I knew that when this started. A lot of what has happened since has been my doing.
Originally Posted by burned
For example, she says happy thanksgiving, I say nothing. Does that send the message that I respect myself too much to want to have anything to do with her? Or do I just come across as a coward who is sulking because he didn't get what he wants?
It is such a difficult balance. I would respond "Thank you. You too". I get a lot of texts/emails about the children. His are more wordy then mine. My responses tend to be "Sure", "No problem" or "I can't".
