Brave Little Gerda, So Chilled She Could Not Speak

[Gerda]

DnJ, as ever, your words are powerful, helpful, comforting to me. It just always takes me a while to reply, mostly because of time. You can't imagine what is going on here with my other lawsuit, children problems -- and it took me literally two weeks to do the SNW because our finances are so complicated and such a mess, so much debt spilling out of every hole.

I loved this line for D9 and told her about it -- Dad, that’s between you and Mom. How about we just do something fun together. Maybe you should have a sticky with your note to my S13 and another for D9 -- letters to MLC kids. So helpful! That's the second time DnJ has "talked" to my kids and helped!

Your advice about all that is of course excellent, and it helps to know how experienced you are with having had so many kids. I have worked with teens all my working life but nothing prepared me for this except my own miserable experience as a teen of divorce. And that was the thing that I thought I would never ever do or allow.

But lately I realize, this is how God is using me. I have to trust Him. I have to walk in his light even when this is where the path leads.

Anyway, I will read your post a bunch of times and hope it will sink in. It requires a lot of confidence. Sometimes I am able to do that by just trusting God. So far I don't think I trust myself very much. But you are right that I am doing better. It was all because I realized that God knows everything, and I have to trust him no matter what. For me, none of the other stuff about detachment or strategizing about how to behave with H or any of that has worked. Only trying to lay it all at God's feet and trust him. And of course knowing you, Gordie, SBJ, sjohn, Job -- your stories and your advice and support and care help me so much.

I am thankful for you all! Happy Thanksgiving! Come have a slice of pumpkin pie tomorrow!

XO