[Living]

Listen, I’m at a loss. I’m not sure what to do. My therapist says I need to have a long talk with him and see what he wants to do about the marriage. I’m not sure if that’s what I should do or not. However, I do think a conversation must be had because I think he may be thinking that we can just resume the marriage. I can say without a doubt that there is no way in hell we can resume this marriage without resolving some major issues.

The crazy thing is I can see signs of the man I fell in love with showing up. Now make no mistake I’m still playing things cool and I’m not acting excited when he says these things to me. I guess I’m just confused as to how I proceed now.

I am by no means a DB expert. And this is the only post of yours that I've read so far. But I see an opportunity here to shift the dynamics a little. Don't do the work for him. He needs to do the work to show that he wants you. Let him come to you. Others might have something to say about this but I think if HE'S interested, he won't STOP being interested just because YOU didn't take the initiative to bring up the R talk. Let him bring it up. In the meantime, think of some of the ways you might respond.

Thank you for your response. I agree with letting him do the work and he absolutely needs to because he’s the one that claimed he was unhappy. The one thing that I am noticing is that he hasn’t stopped pursuing me no matter how much I reject him. I think as others have said it’s best to continue to work on myself and GAL. I will monitor his behavior to see how sincere he really is. But I refuse to bend unless he can get to a point where he sees the errors in his ways and wants to be a better person. Not just for me and the kids but for himself as well. As you stated, he needs to be the one to bring up the R talk. As you also said, I just have to figure out what my response to it will be.