Dealing with a WW trying to save marriage

[SoTorn]

Hi ST,

As a follow up to Amoawful's post, I would suggest you stop telling them how to act with regards to your wife, let them go through the pain and anger they will have. They need to ride this out as much as you do. Each one in his own way.

I also imagine that at some point your wife may find anger from her kids addressed at her and will try to involve you. I recommend you let her fight her own battles and do not get involved either to defend your kids' reactions or try to get them to "like" her. You have enough on your plate already.

In my own parents divorce the problems were never directed at me nor was I the cause but I still felt the pain of watching two people who loved each other now destroy each other. Watch how the bubble that I lived in of happiness and security was torn away. None of them were mad at me but i still faced the same results and consequences as well as watch helplessly as life as I knew it disappeared.

So no, she is not doing this to hurt them nor hurt you but she is hurting both.

Peace

Max

I know the WW already feels the kids emotions. I just don't want her mistreating them. WW cannot handle any sort of confrontation from anyone at this moment. WW can't handle being questioned. D16 had asked her why WW was always gone and WW reacted just like she does when I ask that question "Why are you trying to guilt me, you just give me a hard time about working hard for you, all you care about is yourself!" I don't want my kids to have to deal with that. I want them to spend quality time with their mom. I want them to have a good relationship with their mom. I don't want WW's negative reactive behavior directed at them. I can't handle my kids being mistreated at all. That will make me come right out of DBing and confront WW if I see it. Therefore, since I cannot control WW's actions, I have simply asked the kids to not be confrontational with her, because it will just blow up into an argument. Of course I can't control them, but they see that what I requested is rational.

I am going to take my kids to Main Event later. Its like Dave and Busters. So we have something to do tonight, it will be cool.