H came by this morning to pick up my daughter. He was strangely quiet, helped himself to a coffee and huddled over by our fireplace. He seemed to be avoiding eye contact. I have noticed that whenever we have a good conversation or laugh together or have a “normal” interaction, he seems to take a big step back from me the next time I see him. Is this normal?
I think so. My H is nice to me, but when I am nice back, he always pulls back. It is the 'I don't want them to get too comfortable, it might give them hope" rubbish. Just ignore it. Carry on as if you hadn't noticed.
Originally Posted by DejaVu6
One day of work today and then five days of pool with my peeps. It is going to be such a relief just to concentrate on my sport and nothing else.
Makes me wish I knew you in real life ... you could teach me to play. I am so very very bad at pool. I could offer you painting lessons in return
Originally Posted by DejaVu6
Found out yesterday that my H bought some second-hand bunkbeds for our kids and has a room set up for them. I suppose I should feel happy that he is making a place for them there. It hurts a little bit though...tells me he is planning to be there for a long time.
H has been moved out for 8 months now. Every time he buys a piece of furniture it kills me a little. He bought bookshelves two weeks ago. He always points out that it was on sale and that he got a bargain (as if this is the only reason). That pain, that they are building a life without you, will continue until you fully detach. Obvs. I am still not there as the bookshelf thing shows. This is death by a thousand cuts and, oddly, it is our choice to let it be that. One day I hope H and I will either wake up next to each other or the cuts will have healed and I no longer care what furniture he buys. I hope that for you too.
Side note: H never even picked up a book when we were together and now he needs a whole bookshelf (albeit a small one). Now, I see all sorts of books around his flat - self help books and the 'Alchemist' for FFS. He even read 'The art of not giving a [censored]'. Not sure if you've read it, if you haven't you should. H read it. I don't think he 'got it' though.
