Hurt...that was hard to read. It reeks of waywardness. Personally I would ONLY speak with her about the kids. If she says OM, "I'm not sure I'd want you back", etc...I would be GONE, ain't having/listening to that crap! Take back your self-respect, she's free and clear to have her own thoughts, but don't sit around and validate that nonsense.
Keep doing you and for your kids. When someone like Neffer is telling you that you're hearing BS and to "get an umbrella", heed his words!
And don't let her cook for you. Best advice I ever got on here was to go in a straight line in the opposite direction from my W. Right now you are allowing yourself to get tangled up in your W's wayward web.
